After We Collided (After, #2) by Anna Todd Read Online (FREE)
“I know, I’m not saying that you can or will stop loving him. I just don’t want to be your rebound. I just started dating someone—I haven’t dated anyone since I met you, and I finally met Rebecca. Then, when I drove you home and saw the way you reacted to me dating someone, I started thinking . . . I know I’m an idiot, but I started thinking you didn’t want me to move on or something.” I look away from his handsome face and stare out the window.
“You aren’t my rebound . . . I wanted to kiss you just now; I just don’t know what I’m thinking or doing. Nothing’s made sense to me for the last nine days, and I finally stopped thinking about him when I kissed you and it felt amazing. I felt like I could do this. I could get over him, but I know that it’s not fair for me to use you that way. I’m just confused and irrational. I’m sorry for making you cheat on your girlfriend; that wasn’t my intention. I just—”
“I don’t expect you to move on so soon. I know how deep his claws are into you.”
He has no idea.
“Just tell me one thing,” Zed says and I nod. “Tell me that you’ll at least try to allow yourself to be happy. He hasn’t even called you, not once. He’s done so much shit to you and he hasn’t even tried to fight for you. If that were me, I’d be fighting for you. I would have never let you go in the first place.” He reaches across and tucks an errant lock of hair behind my ear. “Tessa, I don’t need an answer right now, I just need to know that you’re ready to try to be happy. I know you aren’t ready for any type of relationship with me, but maybe someday you will be.”
My mind is racing, my heart is racing and aching all at once, and the air has been sucked out of the car. I want to tell him that I can try and I will try to allow myself this, but the words won’t come. That small smile that Hardin has on his face in the mornings when I finally get him to wake up after complaining about my alarm clock, the way his raspy morning voice says my name, the way he tries to force me to stay in bed with him and I end up squealing and running from the room, the way he likes his coffee black just like me, the way I love him more than anything in the entire world and I wish he could be different. I wish he could be exactly the same, only different—it doesn’t make sense to me, and I know it won’t make sense to anyone else, but that’s the way it is.
I wish I didn’t love him as much as I do. I wish he hadn’t made me fall in love with him.