After We Collided (After, #2) by Anna Todd Read Online (FREE)
He gives me a little look. “You sure you want to talk about this right now? It can wait until coffee o’clock, you know.”
“I’m sure,” I say and force a smile.
I’m used to this back-and-forth with Hardin; it still hurts, but I knew it was coming. It always does. I can’t believe he went to England to get away from me. He said he had to clear his head, but I should be the one clearing mine. I shouldn’t have stayed outside and talked to him for so long. I should have had him drive me here and come right inside the house instead of listening to him. The words he said only made me more confused. I thought for a moment he was going to say he does see and want a future with me, but when it came time for him to say just that, he let me walk away again.
When he admitted that he wanted to take me away to England so I couldn’t leave him, I should have run for the hills, but I know him too well. I know he doesn’t believe he’s worthy of anyone loving him, and I know that in his mind that made sense to him. The problem is that’s not a normal thing to do—he can’t just expect me to give up everything and be trapped with him in England. We can’t be there just because he’s scared that if we’re not, I’ll leave him.
He has a lot of things he needs to work out on his own, and so do I. I love him, but I have to love myself more.
“It was nice, I loved it. Dakota’s apartment is really awesome, and her roommate is really nice,” Landon starts off by saying. And all I can think is that it must be so nice to have an uncomplicated relationship. Memories of Noah and me watching endless hours of movies flash through my mind; nothing was ever complicated with him. But maybe that’s why it didn’t last. Maybe that’s why I love Hardin so much: because he challenges me and we have so much passion between us that it nearly crushes us both.
After he tells me some more details, I pick up on his excitement over New York City. “So are you moving there?” I ask.
“Yeah, I think I am. Not until the semester ends, but I really want to be near her. I miss her a lot,” he tells me.
“I know you do. I’m happy for you, I really am.”
“I’m sorry that you and Hardin . . .”
“Don’t be. It’s done. I’m done. I have to be. Maybe I should come to New York with you.” I smile, and his face lights up with the warm smile I adore so much.
“You could, you know.”
I always say this. I always say I’m done with Hardin, then I go back to him; it’s an endless cycle. So in this moment, I make a decision: “I’m going to talk to Christian Tuesday about Seattle.”